Friday, March 25, 2011

Wow...

....I am a horrible blogger! So, still not prego. I am starting to be ok again with that. I started doing an hour of school a day with my three year old, and I don't know that I could commit the time to preparing and following through with that if I was expecting or had an infant. We plan to put him in preschool next fall and I wanted him to have some idea of what to expect. He does much better in life when I prepare him for things. He's super smart (I'm not biased) and actually loves "school" with mommy. We just started this week and this morning first thing he saw our school box and wanted to do school. No cartoons, no breakfast, just school. I'm sure that won't last, but who knows, I actually enjoyed school so maybe he will too. It doesn't hurt that I let him practice writing his letters in sugar and then he gets to lick his fingers!
I went to a baby shower last night. Here where I live there are always pregnant women. At the shower I ran into an acquaintance who is pregnant and due in August. She has a three year old child who they adopted as an infant and was told never to plan on being pregnant seven years ago. I am so excited for her. She seems nervous and still a little incredulous that it's actually true. She was telling me about it, and paused and said, "I can imagine you understand that feeling completely." Yep, funny cause it was seven years for us too. I just hope she can relax and enjoy her pregnancy. I know that after I got through that first trimester I was so happy. I seriously have never been that happy with my normal hormonal mood fluctuations. You can ask my hubby, he will wholeheartedly agree!  Baby showers are fun, but hard. Since my boy is three now people are starting to ask about another baby soon. I am able to deflect with humor, saying one rambunctious boy is plenty; but the laughter is only on the outside.  But, I do love oogling the cute tiny baby clothes and shoes. The upside to living in prego-ville is that there is always a baby to cuddle! And I don't have to change the diapers or get up in the middle of the night for feedings!
Still doing my fertility monitor. I'm not sure why, but it makes me feel like I'm doing something. Every month I try to find something new to blame my non-pregnancy on. I'm exercising too much, I'm not eating the right foods, my hubby gets too hot when he works out (Zumba, he loves it!), my neighbor who is in peri-menopause is throwing off my cycle......blah, blah, blah.  I have a friend who isn't ovulating right now and her doctor wants her to go on Clomid, but she's nervous. She needs to do what she's comfortable with, but I thought to myself, "Oh, I wish I actually knew some reason I don't get pregnant so I knew what to do about it!" But, it doesn't really matter because we are all in this difficult journey together and whether our circumstances are the same or different we all understand the struggle month after month. 

Monday, March 7, 2011

It's Been A While....

.....since I've done a post. Nothing new to report. Not pregnant, not even sure I ovulated last month which is weird for me. I had a three week cycle, and even though I'm showing some new symptoms around ovulation (nausea and breast tenderness), this month I still had my twingies (as I call them) when I can feel my ovary working; but didn't feel that last month. Who knows?
So, I'm handling my stress levels better. Just ovulated and if it doesn't happen this month there is no way we will be able to use our flex spending for the delivery and other bills. There's not much I can do at this point about that. If we aren't pregnant this month, I will be able to use the money to try to get pregnant. I still need to check and see what is eligible to use flex spending for, but I will worry about that in two weeks if Aunt Flo comes to visit!
The fun part this month is that I ovulated while at my in-laws house and my husband explained to them why he couldn't go in the hot tub during his usual visit to the gym with his dad.  I understand why he did it, his dad wouldn't have let the issue rest until he had a reason, but it's still a little embarrassing to me. My biggest worry is that now they will be expecting an announcement next month that we are pregnant despite the fact that they know we've been trying to get pregnant practically since we had our son three and a half years ago. Oh, well. Life is good and worrying about that won't change anything.
I started using my fertility monitor again. It seems a little silly since I know my cycle, but it's always nice to have confirmation. I am enjoying life, three year olds really are fun, and am grateful that the craziness has subsided a bit.